Besto to Pesto: Ranking ‘Bob’s Burgers’ Halloween Episodes

Without a doubt, holiday episodes are my jam, and Halloween episodes are supreme in that category. In anticipation of Bob’s Burgers’ 9th annual Halloween episode on October 18th, I’ve ranked their 8 existing episodes, taking the following into account: costumes (heavily), spookiness (not so heavily), and story (heaviest). 

Full Bars (S3E2)
The kids go trick-or-treating unsupervised for the first time, leaving Bob and Linda to attend Teddy’s ‘Black and Orange’ Halloween soiree. The kids hop on over to Kings Head Island for the primo candy giveaways, unaware of the danger that lies ahead. I’m always impressed how the writers of Bob’s Burgers can turn kid themes into a thrilling story and this is one of the best examples of that. The murder mystery subplot is just the cherry on top.

The Hauntening (S6E3)
Bob and Linda set up a special bespoke haunted house for Louise, who prides herself in her lack of fear. The staged spooks flop and the Belchers discover that they’re stranded, and then the real terror begins. The Hauntening is hands down the spookiest out of all the Halloween episodes. Unfortunately, the kids didn’t have costumes for this episode but you do get a special Halloween Boyz 4 Now music video at the end.

Fort Night (S4E2)
For Halloween, the kids team up with Andy and Ollie for a group costume, of which Bob and Linda are working hard to make in time for trick or treating. With this, and Darryl’s holy grail candy map, the kids anticipate a fruitful Halloween. The kids take a detour to their makeshift cardboard fort in the alley, when a truck parks in front of it, blocking the fort’s entrance and roof and trapping them inside. The only person who can free them is Millie, but only if she wants to. With no true-spooks or costumes, the episode carried itself on the anxiety of missing Halloween, and it worked.

Nightmare on Ocean Avenue Street (S9E4)
Tina, Louise and Gene are out on Ocean Avenue this year for trick or treating. When everyone’s candy bags begin mysteriously disappearing, the kids set out to find the culprit. Meanwhile, Teddy tries to out-decorate his handyman nemesis, Glenn. This episode’s costumes come in as second best of the series, with Louise dressed as the Dragon with the Girl Tattoo, Gene as Andre 3000 the Giant and Tina as “Nun” of your business. Extra points for Regular-sized Rudy dressed as Paul Rudd from I Love You Man and Andy and Ollie dressed as Peanut Butter and Jelly. 

The Wolf of Wharf Street (S8E3)
The town is on high alert after there are reports of a wolf loose near the wharf. To be safe, Linda accompanies the kids trick or treating while Bob stays behind to nurse an injured leg. While the main story didn’t wow me, the side story of Teddy taking care of Bob is one of the funniest of the series. This episode also had my favorite costume ensemble yet with Gene dressed as Handsome Grapes, Louise as Anton from No Country for Old Men, and Tina as a Mombie. 

Tina and the Real Ghost (S5E2)
Tina begins a romance with Jeff, a ghost who was believed to be living in the restaurant’s basement. When Jeff betrays Tina and begins dating Tammy, leaving Tina heartbroken, Louise and Gene decide to exact revenge. Back at home, word has gotten out that the basement is haunted, sparking a sudden popularity for the restaurant. The shining stars of this episode are Phil and Don, the two ghost hunters who come to investigate the restaurant. 

Pig Trouble in Little Tina (S10E4)
When Tina gets bullied at school after her dreams are haunted by a fetal pig, Louise and Gene are recruited to help her get some sleep again. Meanwhile, Bob and Linda tackle a monster of an ear wax ball in Bob’s ear. The costumes land pretty low in the rankings and these Tina-centric episodes are just not as fun as to me. But, being the adult that I am, I couldn’t help but be invested in the Bob-ear wax subplot.

Teen-a-Witch (S7E3)
When Tammy steals her costume idea for the annual Wagstaff costume contest, Tina turns to witchcraft to solve all her problems. But Tina gets in over her head when she crosses Jackie, the school’s crossing guard and queen supreme witch, who then puts a curse on her. Just like Pig Trouble in Little Tina, I just don’t enjoy the Tina-centric stories as much. That being said, this is Tina’s best costume of the series, a “SAND-witch” and special mention goes to Regular-sized Rudy dressed as Marcel Marceau.

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